Prioritizing Your Practice & Parenting

The life of a woman lawyer and mother inevitably involves a familiar struggle—balancing the competing demands of your job with the commitments of raising children and being actively involved and present with your family. While I don’t always get it right (I’m often a few minutes late to the baseball game or track meet or sending emails to clients from the car as we embark on a ski trip), I have come to realize that there are specific, actionable steps that help me compartmentalize both parts of my life in a way that helps me succeed in both areas.

First, I treat family time as I would any other mandatory appointment on my calendar. Just as I schedule client and committee meetings, I allocate specific time in my calendar for important family activities that otherwise might get overlooked, like taking my daughter shopping for a homecoming dress or taking my son to the movies. Key events, such as school performances, birthdays, first day of school and vacations, are non-negotiable priorities in my schedule. By proactively blocking off time for my husband and our children, I can ensure that my personal priorities don’t get overshadowed by my professional obligations. 

I believe I speak for all of us when I say I wish it was easy to leave work at the office when we shut down our computers each day, but the reality is that modern technology lets work follow us wherever we may go. However, I prioritize my family time through planning ahead and rigorous time management, and my clients and colleagues know I unplug at night and on weekends, but they know how to contact me if they really need me. I am not available all day every day, but I can always be available if there is an issue that needs my immediate attention. The beauty of that same technology is that it allows us to manage our work demands while not missing our kids’ special moments. The key to switching back and forth between mom mode and lawyer mode is to focus on being present—staying in the moment and letting go of guilt, the pursuit of perfection, and any unrelated stress. 

Like most busy lawyers, I have also had to learn the art of delegation. I trust my team (they are amazing!). Not everything needs my oversight. To be able to be successful in several important areas in my life, I am learning to let go and delegate to my amazing colleagues to allow me to have the bandwidth to be my best.

I have also learned that involving my family in my professional life gives them insight into what I do and why I do what I do. My family accompanies me to board retreats and out-of-town conferences, and I often tell them about my work at the dinner table. We also spend time with my colleagues and their families, which provides an even greater understanding of what my work life is like and who I am spending my time with when I am not at home. 

I am deliberate in my approach to managing my time, prioritizing family commitments above all else and relying on a talented team at my firm to support my practice. I don’t always get it right, but I feel like I am successful if I can proactively implement strategies that help keep my priorities aligned, thus allowing me to thrive in each role. 

As my daughter recently left for college this fall, I am acutely aware of how quickly time passes. We don’t get these special moments back and need to be conscious of how we spend our time at work and at home as we walk the tight rope of finding balance in our lives.